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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23614780">inside these pages you just hold me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/astrodrag/pseuds/astrodrag'>astrodrag</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>RuPaul's Drag Race RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, all of the above honestly, dumbassery, sickfics, so it's all over the place, there's angst, this is my unofficial official drabble collection</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:35:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,623</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23614780</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/astrodrag/pseuds/astrodrag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>collection of drabbles based on prompts I got sent on tumblr</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, Gigi Goode/Jan Sport, Gigi Goode/Nicky Doll, Jackie Cox/Jan Sport, Jan Sport/Gigi Goode, Jan Sport/Jackie Cox, Kameron Michaels/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo, Monét X Change/Nina West</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. f/f Branjie: “Stop hogging all the blankets!” & “I’m going to keep you safe.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompts: “Stop hogging all the blankets!” &amp; “I’m going to keep you safe.” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Vanessa woke up shivering in the middle of the night, she wasn’t surprised to see Brooke hogging the blanket to herself in the spot directly next to her. Vanessa let out a tired grumble, rolling over onto her side as Brooke seemed to curl up around the blanket even more.</p><p>“Stop hogging all the blankets!” Vanessa whispered dramatically, accompanied by a huff as she tried to carefully pull some of the blanket back over herself.</p><p>Vanessa’s tired frustration quickly disappeared as she heard Brooke let out a couple of short, scared-sounding whimpers. It was then that she noticed how small the blonde looked, body curled up and shaking in a way that reminded Vanessa of a terrified child. </p><p>Seeing her girlfriend like this was more than unsettling to Vanessa. Brooke hadn’t had a nightmare in months, but Vanessa could tell that this one was bad.</p><p>Before the nightmare had the chance to get any worse, Vanessa cautiously wrapped her arms around Brooke’s shaking frame, placing a couple soft kisses on her shoulder. Vanessa could see the effect her touch had on the blonde, her hold on the blanket loosening a bit despite the soft whimpers she was still letting out.</p><p>“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m going to keep you safe,” Vanessa whispered, pressing a kiss to the back of Brooke’s neck. Vanessa didn’t know if Brooke could actually hear her words, but the whimpers slowly turned back into the soft sounds of Brooke breathing and her body gradually stopped shaking. It was almost like magic to watch, even though Vanessa knew magic was far from being the reason why Brooke appeared to be calming down.</p><p>Vanessa continued to hold the blonde long after she had fully calmed down, not allowing herself to fall back asleep until she was certain that Brooke would be able to sleep through the night without another nightmare.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. m/m Branjie: “ I wish i’d never met you. ”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Prompt: “ I wish i’d never met you. ” m/m Branjie</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Alcohol had always lowered Brooke’s inhibitions. He was more open after he’d had a few drinks; he let himself feel a little more and was generally okay with being a little less perfect. It was freeing, in a way, to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>be</span>
  </em>
  <span>, even if it took a little help getting there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But alcohol mixed with late nights spent alone were a dangerous combination, especially when he was on tour. He had originally gone to get drinks with Nina and Plastique, but had since parted ways with both of them in favor of returning to their respective hotel rooms. And maybe he’d had a couple more drinks after getting back to his room, but that was beside the point.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke was alone, and for the first time since breaking up with Vanjie, he was finally beginning to realize how fucking alone he really was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had tried so hard to make things work, even trying to cut feelings out of it entirely by just being friends with benefits. They should have known that was never going to work, but it didn’t stop them from trying. The result was worse than either of them could have imagined though. Brooke and Vanjie fought </span>
  <em>
    <span>a lot</span>
  </em>
  <span> during the time they spent trying to fuck with no strings attached, jealousy and regrets adding fuel to a fire they had never fully extinguished. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As the hands on the clock seemed to fly by, Brooke knew he should try to get some sleep. They had a show for the season 11 tour the next night, and making sure he was well-rested was a big part of his tour routine. But even though he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>he needed to sleep, Brooke continued to pace the floor of his hotel room, wide awake. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Some time around 2 in the morning, Brooke allowed his feet to carry him out of his hotel room and down the hall. Subconsciously, he knew exactly where he was going, even if he didn’t want to admit it to himself. Then he was standing in the hall outside Vanjie’s door, hesitating only for a second before he knocked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke had been thinking too much. He was angry, emotions running high as his mind seemed inclined to torture him that night by overanalyzing every misstep he had made that cost him the crown in the biggest competition of his career. In the past, he had beaten himself up over imperfect choreography, overly simplistic runway looks, even his lack of confidence and presence in certain challenges. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tonight’s victim was his relationship with Vanjie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke knew the moment he allowed himself to get involved with the other queen that it could cost him the crown; at the time, that didn’t matter. He had told himself that as long as he came out of the competition with the Latino queen by his side, things would be fine. At first, they were. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But four months after filming wrapped, he lost Vanjie. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then a few months later, he lost the crown too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke was happy for Yvie when the Denver queen won, he really was. But it was hard to stay happy for Yvie with fans repeatedly telling him that he had been robbed. At first, he dismissed the comments, knowing that Yvie more than deserved the crown. Over time, however, Brooke began to believe the comments, and as his outlook on his loss grew darker, he needed someone to blame. Vanjie, apparently, was that someone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once Brooke was face to face with the shorter queen, he felt his stomach twist at the look of confusion on the shorter queen’s face. Before Vanjie had a chance to say anything, Brooke began speaking, knowing he was about to dig himself into a hole he very well may never escape.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wish I’d never met you,” Brooke managed to say, his voice surprisingly even despite the slight shake to his hands. Brooke watched as Vanjie’s face immediately fell, arms protectively wrapping around himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re drunk, you don’t mean that,” The shorter queen whispered, sad, dark eyes peering up at Brooke as if trying to read his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I do. You ruined me, Vanjie. My life was fine before I met you, then you walked in and fucked everything up,” Brooke shot back, fighting off tears and blinding rage to the best of his capabilities. “You cost me the biggest title of my career. How the hell am I ever supposed to forgive you for that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause as a heavy silence hung between the two queens, the weight of Brooke’s words threatening to suffocate both of them. He immediately regretted the words the moment they lift his mouth, but there was no taking them back now. It was too late. The damage was done.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Leave,” Vanjie hissed, blinking back the tears threatening to spill at any moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Vanjie, I-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I said </span>
  <em>
    <span>leave</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Brooke left, knowing he just buried himself six feet under with no chance of escape.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. m/m Branjie: “ I want to protect you. ”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “ I want to protect you. ” m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Jose snapped at the taller queen, his eyes narrowed in a way that caused Brock to freeze in place. Seeing the younger man angry had always made him nervous, but when he was the cause of Jose’s anger it downright terrified him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing, I-” Brock started, desperately trying to fan the flames between them before they were swallowed whole.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Bullshit! What the hell was that out there?” Brock could feel the panic bubbling up inside of him at Jose’s angry words. He knew trying to avoid an answer was a risky choice, but now it was clear he wasn’t getting out of this. He watched anxiously as the Puerto Rican ran a frustrated hand through his hair, then shook his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What, no answer?” Jose asked harshly, his arms crossed over his chest. “I want an answer, Brock!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just - I wanted to protect you,” Brock mumbled, allowing his gaze to fall to the floor. He couldn’t look at his ex, not when he had so clearly overstepped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In Brock’s defense, he had done his best not to concern himself with who Jose chose to hook up with, but that night he couldn’t help it. He had overheard the guy making bets with his friends, trying to see just how far he could get with the Puerto Rican queen as if it was a game to him. Brock snapped; he stepped in, telling the guy to fuck off, much to the irritation of Jose, who only caught the end of Brock’s outburst. Brock </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>he had overstepped, but he just couldn’t help it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t get to fucking ‘protect’ me after you broke my heart!” Jose yelled, taking a step backwards. “Policing who I’m fucking ain’t protecting me. It’s none of your damn business, so just stay out of it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brock didn’t know how to respond. He felt sick to his stomach, and part of him wanted to run away from the situation just to avoid facing it. But he was tired of making everything worse by running, so instead he just mumbled a small, “sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry don’t cut it,” Jose spat, before turning on his heel and walking off.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. f/f Branjie: “ Hold me and never let me go. ”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “ Hold me and never let me go. ” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Living alone was new for Vanessa. She had lived with other people her whole life; as a child, she always had relatives around visiting, and while she was in college her friends would frequently crash at her apartment after nights out. Up until just a few months ago, she had been living with her college friends ever since they all graduated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Most of the time, it was nice to finally have a place to herself. Vanessa was able to walk to her kitchen in just an oversized t-shirt without having couch cushions thrown at her by her friends, and she never had to worry about someone being mad when she forgot to take her laundry out of the dryer for a couple days. Living alone was comfortable for Vanessa.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>At least, most of the time it was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That night, though, it was a god damn nightmare. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The storm raging on outside seemed to be sitting directly on top of Vanessa’s apartment building with no intention of leaving anytime soon. It had started nearly two hours ago, gradually getting worse as the minutes ticked by. Now, at 11 pm, Vanessa was sitting on her bedroom floor and rocking in place, blanket clutched around her as she tried to block out the booms of thunder that shook the walls.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thunderstorms were one of the few things Vanessa was genuinely scared of. They had terrified her since childhood, but she had always had someone around to calm her down whenever a bad one hit. Now, the only person Vanessa could think to turn to was the stunning blonde across the hall from her, but she was nervous about heading over there. Vanessa and the blonde, Brooke, were friends, sure. That didn’t mean Brooke would be willing to help soothe Vanessa in the middle of a storm though, assuming she was even home.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then Vanessa saw a bright blue flash outside of her window, and any concerns she had about asking Brooke for help were gone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stood up, forcing herself to leave her blanket in a pile on the edge of her bed, before scurrying out of her apartment to knock on Brooke’s door. Vanessa knocked once, softly at first. After hearing another thunderous boom, she let out a startled yelp and knocked five times more, much more loud and frantic this time. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself as she stood in the hall, rocking back and forth on her heels. Where the hell was Brooke? If she wasn’t home, Vanessa swore -</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Vanessa could finish her thought, the door finally opened. Brooke stood before her, hair pulled up in a messy bun, wearing a pair of athletic shorts and a tank top. Vanessa could tell from one glance Brooke had either just gone to bed, or was about to do so, when she knocked. For a second, she felt bad, and debated going back to hiding in her room, then a series of thunder claps rang throughout the air. Without a second thought, Vanessa threw herself into Brooke’s arms, making no effort to hide the fact that she was clinging to the girl she lived across the hall from.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thankfully, instead of freaking out or asking questions, Brooke just wrapped her arms around Vanessa, instantly making her feel much safer already. Vanessa let out a soft sigh, burying her face in Brooke’s shoulder. She was consciously aware of the fact that this was the closest she had been to the taller girl; taking a deep breath in, she could smell the faint scent of vanilla, undoubtedly from whatever perfume Brooke had put on that morning. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a moment had passed between them, Vanessa hesitantly pulled away, taking a step back. She knew she should have said something, explained what was going on, but all she could do was awkwardly cross her arms over her chest and mumble a small </span>
  <em>
    <span>sorry</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She knew her behavior was so unlike how she normally acted, but her fears brought out the worst in her. Thunderstorms, in particular.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When Vanessa finally dared to take a glance up at Brooke’s face, she felt her stomach wrench at the look of concern on the other woman’s face. Without saying another word, Brooke stepped to the side, gesturing for Vanessa to come in. She was grateful, really. She had only known Brooke for a couple months, but Brooke already seemed to know what she needed before she even knew herself. It was something that had quickly made her feel like she could trust Brooke with anything, despite simultaneously not wanting to bother her with all of her issues. She knew the blonde had problems of her own to deal with, so it wasn’t fair to pile more on her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tonight, unfortunately, would just have to be an exception.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is everything okay?” Brooke asked softly, her voice barely above a whisper. Vanessa couldn’t find the words to respond, so she simply nodded her head instead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanessa watched as Brooke silently stepped to the side, holding her door open for Vanessa, wordlessly inviting the shorter girl into her apartment. She let out a soft sigh of relief, allowing her feet to carry her straight to the couch placed in the middle of the living room. Vanessa heard the faint click of the door shutting behind her, and the thunder she knew was still right on top of them already felt more distant. Brooke was there, inviting her inside because she knew something was wrong. Vanessa could feel her heart swell with affection for the blonde.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A moment later, Brooke had taken a seat beside Vanessa. There was an easy sort of silence that passed between them, one where they just looked at each other, almost reading one another like a book. Things between them were easy, they made sense, despite Vanessa knowing they could probably never be more than friends. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But for tonight, all Vanessa needed was a friend, and a good one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Worried about the storm?” Brooke asked softly, her hands folded in her lap. Vanessa just nodded her head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What can I do to help?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hold me and never let go,” Vanessa muttered quietly, half expecting the other girl to interpret her words as a joke. But then Brooke was carefully wrapping her arms around Vanessa, allowing the shorter girl to immediately snuggle into her side.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They remained this way for almost the rest of the evening, moving after a little while so they could lie down together on Brooke’s couch. Being in Brooke’s arms was the safest Vanessa had ever felt during a storm. As she was drifting off to sleep later that evening, Vanessa made the conscious decision to come visit Brooke whenever there was a storm from that point forward.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. m/m Ninex: “I want to take care of you.” & “You’re making me blush!”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Promot: “I want to take care of you.” &amp; “You’re making me blush!” m/m Ninex</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Nina and Monet were just friends. Or at least, that was Nina kept telling himself. They were friends, and Nina was just going to check up on his sick </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He had absolutely no reason to be feeling butterflies in his stomach, but no matter how much he tried to calm them, they continued to flutter almost violently inside of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nina had a very specific game plan. All he had to do was run in, drop off the medicine Monet had asked him to pick up, then run out. Simple enough. But the moment he stepped inside Monet’s apartment, the game plan went flying right out the fucking window.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Seeing Monet curled up on his couch, wrapped in two large blankets, caused Nina to come to a standstill in the doorway of the other queen’s home. There was something undeniably adorable in the vulnerability Monet showed, a change of pace from the don’t-give-a-fuck New Yorker persona Nina was so used to seeing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nina would have been be lying if he said it didn’t make his heart flutter in his chest at least a little bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re a fucking lifesaver,” Monet coughed, the words bringing Nina back to the present.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s nothing, anything for you,” Nina replied, trying to stay calm and nonchalant despite the butterflies beginning to feel much more like his stomach was doing somersaults inside of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just friends, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he reminded himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is there anything else you need? I, uh, I could stay if you want,” Nina offered, </span>
  <em>
    <span>knowing</span>
  </em>
  <span> that his offer was more than just friendly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to do that, I ain’t dying.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But I want to. I want to take care of you.” There was a moment of silence that passed between them, making Nina wonder if he had just fucked everything up by overstepping. But then Monet was shifting on the couch, making room for Nina to take a seat beside the other queen, and Nina swore his heart skipped a beat or two.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But no, they were </span>
  <em>
    <span>just friends</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Nothing more.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Nina carefully perched himself on the couch beside Monet, he set the bag from the drugstore on the small coffee table. Glancing over at Monet, he couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on his face, earning him a raised eyebrow from his sick </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the hell are you smiling at?” Monet’s voice cracked as he spoke, letting out a couple coughs following his words. Nina leaned over and carefully placed a reassuring hand on Monet’s back, as if reminding him not to strain himself too much.</span>
</p><p><span>“Even when you’re sick, you’re still incredibly handsome.” Yeah, because that’s </span><em><span>totally </span></em><span>something </span><em><span>friends </span></em><span>say to each other,</span> <span>Nina thought to himself. </span></p><p>
  <span>Then it was Monet’s turn to smile, shaking his head before speaking, “You’re making me blush.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh yeah?” Something about the way Monet was smiling at Nina gave him a boost of confidence, scooting in a bit closer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Monet hummed in response, and before Nina’s confidence had the opportunity to dissipate just as quickly as it had appeared, he leaned forward to give Monet a soft kiss, hand gently resting on his cheek. Nina was shocked when Monet didn’t immediately pull away, the shock doubling as he felt Monet kiss back. His heart was beating so rapidly inside his chest that he </span>
  <em>
    <span>swore </span>
  </em>
  <span>the other queen must have been able to hear it, but he didn’t care in that moment. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just friends</span>
  </em>
  <span> be damned, he thought.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time Monet finally pulled away, Nina could no longer contain the dorky grin that had spread across his face. He leaned in to try to peck Monet’s cheek, but was met with a playful laugh and a shake of the head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re gonna get sick.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t care if you don’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Bitch, how are you gonna take care of me if you’re sick?”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. m/m Ninex: “ Don’t leave me… ”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “ Don’t leave me… ” m/m Ninex</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Hookups were not Nina’s thing. They were messy, and for someone who believed so strongly in love at first sight and all the other romantic tropes found in Disney movies, they were also painfully confusing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With Monet, Nina knew the other queen wasn’t in love with him. Their arrangement was purely physical for Monet, even though Nina desperately wished it would turn into so much more. Every time they met up in a different city, Nina found himself hoping that maybe this would be the time that Monet looks at him with love instead of just lust, that maybe this would be the time he finally gained the courage to tell Monet how he really felt. But every time, the look in Monet’s eyes was the same, and Nina could never bring himself to risk fucking up the only attention he would probably ever get from the other queen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were in Seattle that night, the view from their hotel room overlooking the Puget Sound. The city was peaceful, calming Nina in a way that he had only ever known Columbus to be able to. Maybe that was why after their usual hookup, as Monet was getting ready to leave for his own hotel room down the hall, Nina finally found the courage to speak up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, stay,” He said quietly, his hands gripping the hotel blanket to ground himself in the moment. But of course Monet didn’t seem to hear, which sent a jolt of panic running through Nina. “Monet,” He said, his voice a little louder and definitely more shaky.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nina watched as the other man turned to face him, a single eyebrow raised questioningly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t leave me,” Nina blurted out, a frantic energy consuming him as he tried to piece together the words to express how he felt. “Stay the night, we can talk or fuck or whatever, just… Please stay? I like you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nina could tell just from the look on Monet’s face that the other queen didn’t return Nina’s feelings, and that was fine. He expected as much, despite hoping for his fairy tale ending. Just as Monet was about to open his mouth to speak, Nina saw a slight shift in his eyes. It wasn’t the loving look Nina had been hoping for, but it was just soft enough to fuel Nina’s borderline-delusional hopes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Nina, it’s not like that for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stay anyway, just for tonight. Then we never have to talk about this again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a look of hesitation from Monet, but it only lasted a moment before he was climbing back into bed beside Nina.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They didn’t fuck or talk at all that night, they just laid beside each other in silence. And if Monet ended up holding Nina throughout the night, they didn’t talk about it in the morning. They didn’t talk about any of it in the morning, just went their own ways until they found each other in another city a few weeks later.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. f/f Branjie: Vanjie being cute with the cats</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: "Brooke is trying to eat her Frosted Flakes but Vanessa is being too cute (maybe w the kitties) and Brooke is just in fucking love" f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Brooke hated having to get up before the sun was up. It felt wrong, cruel even, to force anyone to wake up so early. That morning, it felt particularly cruel, because all Brooke wanted to do was lay in bed with her wife all day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had stayed in bed as long as possible that morning, cuddled up with Vanessa as the minutes ticked by on the clock. She let herself lay there for 30 minutes before forcing herself to get up, knowing she would be late if she waited any longer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Brooke went about her morning routine, she expected Vanessa to go back to bed, take advantage of her day off and sleep in a bit. Instead, Brooke walked into the kitchen to see Vanessa lying on the floor of their living room with their cats. Henry was snuggled up against Vanessa’s side, purring loudly, while Apollo stood on her stomach as she scratched his head lightly. It warmed Brooke’s heart to see her two cats being so affectionate with Vanessa, especially since she had been so worried about them not liking her when they first started dating. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The day Vanessa moved in, the cats would not leave her side. They were thrilled that she was becoming a permanent part of their home, more so than Brooke ever could have expected. When she and Vanessa had gotten married, they had joked to nosy relatives that Henry and Apollo were the only babies they needed in their lives, and had kept it that way since.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even though she had witnessed plenty of cute moments between Vanessa and the cats, seeing them curled up on the floor that morning was enough to make Brooke’s heart swell. She sat at the island in their kitchen, watching as Apollo laid down on top of Vanessa and joined Henry in loudly purring. She could see Vanessa’s face light up, hear her cooing affectionate little praises at both of the cats. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was moments like this where Brooke knew she would never love anyone else as much as she loved Vanessa</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. m/m Branjie: jealous Brooke</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: "Brooke is jealous because someone is hitting on Vanessa." m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Brooke was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> the jealous type. Or at least, he didn’t used to be. He used to be someone who was comfortable with flings, preferring them over a real relationship because letting someone have his body was easier than letting them have his heart. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Vanjie had changed all of that for him. It was something he simultaneously loved and hated, but tonight, he absolutely hated it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Watching drunk college boys hitting on Vanjie left right and center was beyond irritating for Brooke, pushing into the realm of being infuriating. One in particular had been pretty persistent about hitting on Vanjie, circling back to the queen after each visit to the bar. Brooke could see the guy gradually moving in closer, lean in to whisper something in Vanjie’s ear that caused him to laugh, and felt his irritation bubbling up to the surface.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment he saw the guy grab Vanjie’s hand to dance, he knew he had seen enough.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke made his way across the floor to get to Vanjie, placing a hand on his shoulder to get the younger man’s attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nina asked me to come grab you, said he needed your help with something,” Brooke explained, shooting the guy a very forced apologetic smile before looping his arm through Vanjie’s to whisk him away from the college student.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke led Vanjie back to the bathrooms, pulling him inside without saying a word. The moment the door was closed, Brooke had to fight back the urge to push Vanjie against the wall and kiss him with everything he had. No matter how badly he wanted to, he knew it would be a bad idea, only serving to confuse both of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, Brooke decided to pick a fight. (Or maybe, just maybe, the tequila shots he had taken earlier were making the decision for him. At least, that’s what he would convince himself of later.)</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the hell was that out there?” He spat out, his arms crossing over his chest. He could see the look of confusion and anger in Vanjie’s eyes, watching the younger man shift his weight from one foot to the other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“None of your damn business. You don’t own me, you know.” Even though Brooke knew Vanjie was right, that didn’t stop the frustration he felt, accompanied by an ache in his chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, it is my business. I still love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause, a moment of silence between them before Vanjie opened the bathroom door back up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well maybe you shouldn’t.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. m/m Branjie: sickfic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: m/m "Maybe a branjie sickfic as a prompt?"</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Vanjie hated being sick. He hated having to be stuck in bed when he could be out doing shit, especially hated it today because he couldn't go on his date with Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Filming had wrapped up a month ago, and things between them had been pretty damn great - at least, as great as they could be given their busy schedules and the distance between their homes. They both had the weekend free, so Brooke had flown out to visit Vanjie and take him on a date, but now all of that was going down the drain because of a damn cold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanjie had tried to insist that he was fine, that they could still go on their dinner date, but the moment Brooke heard him coughing uncontrollably during their phone call, he called the date off. It upset Vanjie at first, but he understood, knowing he would have felt awful if he ended up getting Brooke sick.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But what Vanjie wasn’t expecting was to hear his doorbell ring, followed a couple minutes later by a soft ding from his phone as he got a text from Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Come answer the door, I’m outside and I have food.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanjie didn’t think he’d ever gotten out of bed so quickly in his life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite feeling completely miserable, Vanjie couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face at the sight of Brooke standing on his doorstep. The taller man had a carryout bag in his hand, the other one resting comfortably in the pocket of the red sweatshirt he was wearing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’re you doing here?” Not that Vanjie wasn’t happy to see Brooke, but he was confused. He knew the other man hated being sick as much as he did, if not more. But if Brooke was willing to risk getting sick by coming to see him, well, he certainly wasn’t complaining.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know we had to cancel our date, but I wanted to see how you were doing and figured I could at least bring you some food. Consider it a night in, rather than going out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanjie knew in that moment that he didn’t just love Brooke, he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>in love </span>
  </em>
  <span>with Brooke. Completely and utterly in love.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. m/m Branjie: "why do I love you?" / idiots in love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “'why do I love you?' (one of them is a dummy and does smth stupid and the other is also a dummy but in love and just falls deeper in love)" m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Dublin wasn’t known for being a city where people fell in love, but maybe it could be one where people fell </span>
  <em>
    <span>back </span>
  </em>
  <span>in love, Brooke thought to himself as he wandered the streets with Vanjie. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then again, Brooke had never really fallen out of love with Vanjie. Sure, they had broken up for a while, but that never meant Brooke stopped loving Vanjie. Quite the opposite, actually; every day that they had spent broken up had this distinct emptiness to it, like Vanjie left a void the moment he walked out of Brooke’s life. In a way, Brooke supposed that’s exactly what happened, even if he didn’t want to admit it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their mutual decision to break up was what was best for them at the time. Things were too busy, too crazy to maintain a healthy relationship. They knew after four short months that they wouldn’t make it, not with their lives destined to become busier and crazier once their season of Drag Race began airing. So, they agreed to call it quits.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>To this day, it was probably the dumbest decision Brooke had ever made. In hindsight, he made a lot of dumb decisions when it came to Vanjie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But at that point, they had been back together for a few days. They were taking it slow this time, no pressure, no major commitments. Maybe it was another one of Brooke’s dumb decisions, but he was hopeful things would work out this time around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke could feel Vanjie’s hand slip into his own as they walked, his heart damn near skipping a beat at the small action. It wasn’t much, but it was something, and Brooke had almost forgotten how much he craved any form of contact with the other man.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Periodically, Vanjie would let go of his hand, running towards a group of birds that had gathered on the sidewalk with the sole intention of watching them scatter frantically. Each time, it brought a smile to Brooke’s face and caused him to let out a laugh, one he knew would only ensure the other man continued to torment groups of birds any time he saw them. But without fail, after the birds flew away each time, Vanjie’s hand would slip right back into Brooke’s, almost as if it belonged there. In a way, it felt like Vanjie was coming back to him over and over again, </span>
  <em>
    <span>coming home</span>
  </em>
  <span>, because any place they were together had come to feel like home to Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a morning full of sight-seeing, Brooke found himself being pulled inside a small storefront after Vanjie had declared multiple times that he was hungry, the large sign above the door reading </span>
  <em>
    <span>Supermac’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>in bright red font. He glanced around, taking in the unfamiliar setting; white walls with old photos of Dublin mounted on them, a few red booth seats, and a staircase leading up to another seating area, according to the sign on the wall. Brooke slid into one of the booths, waiting as Vanjie walked up to the counter to order for the both of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A few minutes passed, and Vanjie returned to their table with a tray of food. He pushed a slice of pizza towards Brooke, setting his burger and drink to the side. The younger man grabbed his fries, throwing one up into the air in an attempt to catch it in his mouth. But he missed, and the fry fell onto the floor, causing Vanjie to pout as he glanced down at it longingly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn it,” he muttered, quickly grabbing another fry to try again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke couldn’t help but laugh as he watched Vanjie try over and over again to catch one of his fries in his mouth. After 6 or so tries, the younger man let out an excited yelp as he finally caught one, earning them a few confused stares from the employees behind the counter a few feet away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re an idiot,” Brooke mumbled affectionately, grinning as he shook his head. “Remind me - why do I love you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, but I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>your </span>
  </em>
  <span>idiot,” Vanjie replied, flashing Brooke a shit-eating grin. “‘Cause I keep you on your toes, Twinkletoes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a moment of silence between the two of them, one where Brooke just looked at Vanjie fondly, before reaching his hand across the table to grab the younger man’s. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you.” Brooke’s voice was soft, low enough to avoid being overheard by passersby, but still loud enough for Vanjie to hear the words clearly. He watched as Vanjie’s grin softened, his hand gently squeezing Brooke’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you too.”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>So maybe they were incapable of truly taking things slow, but that didn’t matter much to Brooke in the moment. He had Vanjie back, the void in his life was filled, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>was all that truly mattered to him right then.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. f/f Branjie: “Is this your first time”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Is this your first time” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Is this your first time?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanessa’s hands were clamming up, and she found herself rubbing them against the sides of her jeans before shaking them out, hoping it would magically calm her nerves. It was dumb to be so nervous, but she couldn’t help it when Brooke was looking at her that way - an amused glint in her eyes, flashing her a slight smirk as she crossed her arms over her chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All Vanessa could do in that moment was nod her head, earning her a laugh from Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Seriously? You’ve never been bowling before?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...does Wii bowling count?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanessa watched as her girlfriend threw her head back, letting out another laugh. Then Brooke was closing the distance between them, placing a gentle kiss on Vanessa’s forehead as she pulled the younger woman into a hug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, babe, it doesn’t. But I’m sure you’ll be great,” Brooke murmured reassuringly. Vanessa let out a soft, content sigh, and allowed her eyes flutter shut for a moment as she focused on the feeling of Brooke rubbing her hand over Vanessa’s back to keep her grounded. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a moment, Vanessa was already beginning to feel better, her nerves dissipating slowly. Somehow, Brooke always knew how to calm Vanessa down. It was something she was grateful for, would always love about her girlfriend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After all, there was no one else she’d rather spend firsts like this one with.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. m/m Branjie: angsty "Why do I love you?"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: "Why do I love you?" m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Vanjie felt like he was stuck in a cycle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Being lured in by Brooke’s undeniable charm, drawn in by his magnetic pull that Vanjie never could resist. Things would be good for a while, his heart would race like everything was shiny and new all over again, like there had never been anything tarnishing the dream-like romance they shared.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But sooner or later, the jealousy would hit him like whiplash, reminding him of the harsh reality he lived in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They weren’t together anymore. They hadn’t been officially dating for almost a year, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, it was like a stab to the heart each time he was forced to remember how little of a role in Brooke’s life he actually played. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanjie knew that he wasn’t much more than a fun hookup to Brooke, a friendly flirtationship. Maybe at one point Brooke had genuinely loved him, but Vanjie knew that wasn’t the case anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But to Vanjie? Brooke was the one who got away, his fucking north star guiding him through even the darkest of nights. But the sky had gotten cloudy lately and Vanjie had been lead astray one too many times to rely on Brooke the way he once did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he lay in bed at night, flicking through old photos, Vanjie was overwhelmed with emotions. He couldn’t keep doing this with Brooke, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>he couldn’t. But at the same time, he knew that if Brooke ever expressed any desire to get back together, he would jump at the opportunity.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Vanjie sighed, staring at an old photo of them that had been posted to instagram while their season was airing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn it, why do I love you?” He murmured under his breath, before turning his phone off for the night.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. f/f Branjie: “I didn’t know you could dance like that!” & “I know what I want, when I want it. So get over here.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “I didn’t know you could dance like that!” &amp; “I know what I want, when I want it. So get over here.” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Halloween was one of Vanessa’s favorite holidays, hands down. She loved the creativity that went into the holiday, loved seeing what everyone dressed up as, loved dressing up too.</p><p>Oh, and the parties were always fun, too.</p><p>That night, Vanessa found herself at her friend Yvie’s party dressed as Wonder Woman. She had come to the party with Silky and Akeria, who were supposed to dress as Batwoman and Supergirl, but had apparently completely misunderstood. Or at least, Silky had misunderstood, dressing up as a bat instead; Akeria on the other hand seemed to have simply disregarded the group theme, opting for a sexy witch costume. Go figure.</p><p>Standing in Yvie’s kitchen with a drink in her hand, Vanessa soon realized that she was not the only Wonder Woman in attendance. She mumbled something about <em>basic bitches</em> under her breath before taking a sip of her drink, leaning back against the counter. </p><p>For a moment, she debated ditching her head piece because the damn thing wouldn’t stay in place. Reaching one hand up, she let out a huff as she tried to re-adjust it, only succeeding in getting it caught on her hair somehow. </p><p>“Fuck this thing,” Vanessa declared, pulling it off and setting it on the counter beside her.</p><p>“Having some problems there?” A tall woman to Vanessa’s right asked, letting out a soft chuckle. Glancing over, Vanessa could immediately tell that the woman was dressed as Catwoman, black catsuit hugging the curves of her body perfectly. Her blonde hair fell effortlessly around her face, and the black mask on her face made her green eyes pop. It wasn’t <em>fair </em>how good she looked, Vanessa thought to herself.</p><p>There was something familiar about the blonde, she just couldn’t quite place her yet.</p><p>“Maybe,” she replied, quirking an eyebrow up at the blonde. Getting the hint, Vanessa watched as the blonde pulled her mask off, setting it down beside Vanessa’s discarded head piece.</p><p>Vanessa was struck by the realization of who the blonde was once she took her mask off. <em>Brooke. </em>The woman worked with Vanessa and Yvie, which made sense why Vanessa thought she seemed familiar. </p><p>If Vanessa was being honest, she had never pegged Brooke as the Halloween party type. At work, Brooke tended to keep to herself, typically working right through her lunch hour rather than joining the others during their one collective break. But now, standing in front of her, Brooke seemed like a whole other person. She was <em>smiling</em>, her eyes glinting almost mischieviously as she leaned against the counter beside Vanessa.</p><p>“Are you just gonna stare at me, or are you gonna ask me to dance?” Brooke asked teasingly, letting out a soft chuckle. God, her <em>laugh</em>. Vanessa swore she could listen to the sound of her laugh on repeat for the rest of her life and be content with it.</p><p><em>Snap out of it</em>, she mentally chided herself as she shook her head. Quickly realizing how it looked to Brooke, she covered up by awkwardly laughing and letting her elbows rest on the countertop behind her.</p><p>“I don’t think you want that,” she insisted. Brooke, however, clearly was not taking no for an answer. Vanessa felt a jolt of electricity run through her as Brooke grabbed her hands, acutely aware of just how perfectly their hands fit together.</p><p>
  <em>Jesus, how many fucking drinks did she have?</em>
</p><p>“I know what I want, when I want it. So get over here.”</p><p>There was no opportunity for Vanessa to object, Brooke immediately beginning to pull her towards the living room, where everyone was dancing. Not that Vanessa even wanted to when she saw the way Brooke’s face broke out into a grin the moment the stepped into the living room, her body gracefully beginning to sway to the music. Vanessa felt one of her hands get lifted up, then Brooke was guiding her through a spin and she couldn’t help but let out a giggle. </p><p><em>A fucking giggle? Smooth, Vanessa</em>, she thought to herself as she glanced up at Brooke. But seeing the sheer joy in the blonde’s eyes as she danced, doing the best she could in the crowded room without running into anyone, Vanessa couldn’t focus on how stupid that giggle had been for long. </p><p>“I didn’t know you could dance like that!” She called out to Brooke over the loud bass of the music, subconsciously moving closer to the blonde as she danced with her. </p><p>“Took ballet as a kid,” she explained, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly. “I’m not that good, really.”</p><p>“Shut up, you’re amazing!” Vanessa exclaimed, her heart nearly skipping a beat at the was Brooke’s face softened, her smile timid for the first time that evening.</p><p>“I like you,” Brooke blurted out a moment later. “Why don’t we hang out more?”</p><p>“Because you never leave your damn office, not even for lunch.”</p><p>“Maybe that needs to change. Can we get lunch together next week?”</p><p>Vanessa could hardly believe her ears, but immediately she nodded her head and flashed Brooke a grin.</p><p>“Great! It’s a date then,” the blonde said, trying (and failing) to wink playfully at Vanessa, who just let out a booming laugh in response. </p><p>It was a date. <em>She had a date. </em></p><p>The words continued to echo in Vanessa’s mind for the rest of the night, most of which was spent dancing and laughing with Brooke. She could get used to this Brooke.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. m/m Kamjie: “I didn’t know you could dance like that!” & “This is… exactly what it looks like.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>“I didn’t know you could dance like that!” &amp; “This is… exactly what it looks like.” m/m Kamjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Vanjie didn’t think he had ever been this nervous for a show before.</p><p>This was his last night on fucking Werq the World, arguably the biggest show he had done in his entire career. He couldn’t afford to fuck it up, especially not if he ever wanted a shot at joining the tour again in the future.</p><p>While the other queens were off in their dressing rooms finishing getting ready, Vanjie was out on the stage running through his choreography for what felt like the millionth time. Headphones in his ears, he ran through the moves again, even though his body had already committed them to memory. He wanted to be able to do the routine blindfolded without fucking up.</p><p>Not that he was actually trying to do it blindfolded, he just wanted the assurance of knowing his last performance would be his best. Not only that, but Detox was joining the tour that night, which was only added pressure for him since he didn’t want to</p><p>He was in the middle of a turn when he spotted a figure standing between the rows of border curtains, watching his every move. Vanjie paused, pulling his headphones out as he watched Kameron walk over, only in half drag.</p><p>If it had been any of the other queens, Vanjie probably would have been shitting himself knowing he was being watched. Sure, he was friends with them, but he still worried that he wasn’t living up to insanely high standard some of them had helped set for the tour.</p><p>“I didn’t know you could dance like that,” Kameron commented, his words earning him a booming laugh from Vanjie.</p><p>“Really, bitch? You seen me dance before,” he replied as he raised an eyebrow at the other queen.</p><p>“Yeah, but not like <em>that.” </em></p><p>Vanjie watched as the other queen shrug, then take another step forward. Maybe he was imagining it, but it felt like there had been this…<em>tension </em>building between them throughout the tour.</p><p>No, he was <em>definitely </em>imagining it.</p><p>“What the fuck does that mean?” Vanjie asked after a moment, realizing he had let an awkward silence fall between them. He <em>hated </em>awkward silences.</p><p>“You’re not dancing like you’ve got something to prove for once, you’re dancing like you’ve already proved you’re the baddest bitch here.” Kameron’s hand was on Vanjie’s arm as he spoke, making direct with the younger queen.</p><p>Okay, maybe there was a chance he wasn’t imagining it.</p><p>Before Vanjie could say something in response, he could hear one of the crew members call out that they only had an hour left until the meet &amp; greet, and that they should finish getting ready as soon as possible. He just nodded, but didn’t move from his spot. </p><p>Something about the moment felt electric, in a way Vanjie hadn’t felt since before his breakup with Brooke almost a year prior.</p><p>He didn’t want the moment to end. </p><p>But unfortunately it had to end. Kameron’s hand dropped back down to his side, and he flashed Vanjie a smile that caused his stomach to do flips.</p><p><em>Well shit, </em>Vanjie thought. <em>That wasn’t a good sign</em>.</p><p>He did his best to shake it off though, heading straight to his dressing room the moment Kameron walked away.</p><p>That night, Vanjie put his heart and soul into his performance. Between his moment with Kameron before the show (could he even call it a moment?) and the sight of Brooke sitting in the audience, Vanjie felt the fire inside of him burn so bright it threatened to consume him. </p><p>As he walked off stage, he felt lighter somehow, like he could take on the world. He felt free. </p><p>Invincible.</p><p>With a determined spring in his step, Vanjie made his way backstage, heading straight for Kameron’s dressing room. He was on such a high from his performance, and now he was determined to figure out if that moment earlier had actually been a <em>moment</em>.</p><p>Fuck it. It was his last night on tour, what did he have to lose?</p><p>He was pleased to find the door to Kameron’s dressing room wide open, the other queen sitting in front of the mirror as he scrolled through his phone.</p><p>Maybe he said something to Kameron, maybe he didn’t. The adrenaline pumping through his veins blurred his memory. Before he knew it, he was kissing Kameron with everything he had, and <em>damn </em>it felt good. Kameron’s hands gripped at his waist, pulling him closer as Vanjie dug his nails into his shoulders.</p><p>It felt like mere seconds had passed before Vanjie could hear Asia’s exasperated sigh and Plastique dramatically gasping. Kameron jumped back, startled by the sudden presence of the other queens.</p><p>“Kameron! Vanjie! What the <em>hell </em>is this?” Asia spat out, wide eyes darting between the two of them.</p><p>“This is…” Kameron started, only to be cut off by Vanjie.</p><p>“This is exactly what it looks like. Now get the hell out, y’all nosey.”</p><p>With that, Vanjie shut the door dramatically and pulled Kameron into another kiss.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. f/f Branjie: “You take me instead, do you hear me? Give her back and take me instead.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “You take me instead, do you hear me? Give her back and take me instead.” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>A chill ran down Brooke’s spine as she stepped through the front door of her home, Vanessa’s pleading voice the only thing cutting through the silence. Her heart plummeted inside her chest, her entire body going rigid as she strained to hear anything else from the front door. Nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sucking in a deep breath, she slowly set her purse down beside the door, making sure not to let it </span>
  <em>
    <span>thud </span>
  </em>
  <span>against the hardwood floor. Her eyes darted around the living room quickly, trying to scope out what she could feasibly use to protect herself, should the need arise. It was then that she cursed herself (and Vanessa too, really) for not </span>
  <em>
    <span>at least</span>
  </em>
  <span> storing a baseball bat by the coat rack or something. But just as the thought was running through her brain, her eyes landed on the large pink umbrella Vanessa always kept by the door, reserved for taking the kids out to the bus stop in the rain.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, it looked like Brooke was finding another purpose for the umbrella.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Carefully, she began to tiptoe through the room, her heart pounding erratically. She was scared of exhaling too loudly, not wanting to draw attention to herself. But then she heard the unmistakable sound of Aurora shrieking, followed by Apollo bolting into the living room, and Brooke threw caution to the window.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Avoiding stepping on Henry and Thackery as they also darted out of the kids’ bedroom, Brooke ran full speed ahead through the house. She skidded to a stop in the doorway of Aurora and Macy’s room, her shoulder hitting the wall. The umbrella clattered to the floor with the force of her collision, which almost caused her to curse under her breath.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then she saw Vanessa sitting on the floor in front of Macy, who was clutching one of Aurora’s teddy bears to her chest. Brooke could see Vanessa holding a doll out to Macy, Aurora looking up at Brooke from over Vanessa’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mommy’s home!” Aurora squealed, barreling across the room to throw her arms around Brooke excitedly. Brooke let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s going on here sweety?” Brooke asked softly, leaning down to hug Aurora as soon as she was within reach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Macy stole my doll and won’t give it back! Can you get my doll back, Mommy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke let out a soft chuckle, relief finally washing over her. Nodding her head, Brooke took a seat beside Vanessa on the floor to help her convince Macy to give back Aurora’s doll.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. f/f Goodedoll: “I want you. All of you, and not just half-heartedly, wholly. And maybe that’s selfish, but I don’t care.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “I want you. All of you, and not just half-heartedly, wholly. And maybe that’s selfish, but I don’t care.” f/f Gigi/Nicky</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Maybe it was a long shot. Maybe it would never work out. Maybe it would ruin their friendship. Regardless, Gigi knew she had to give it a try.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had been holding her feelings in for too long, trying to prevent the bubble they seemed to live in from bursting. If the bubble burst now, so be it. She felt like she was losing her mind trying to keep her feelings hidden. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>to say something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Pulling her phone out, Gigi pressed the call button beside Nicky’s contact before she could change her mind, before she had a chance to talk herself out of this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The phone rang three times before she heard someone answer, her heart skipping a beat as pressed the speaker button and wiped her palms on her knees.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello?” As Nicky spoke, Gigi felt her heart soar while her stomach did flips, the sound of the other woman’s voice like music to her ears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gigi paused for a moment, sucking in a deep breath before speaking. “Nicky, can we talk?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She heard noise in the background of the other line, followed by an annoyed sigh from Nicky. “Hold on, </span>
  <em>
    <span>some </span>
  </em>
  <span>people don’t know how to be quiet in here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The words were followed by cursing under her breath, words uttered in French that Gigi couldn’t understand even if her life depended on it. She heard a door open, then the distinct sound of it clicking shut a few seconds later, and suddenly the background chatter was gone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Much better,” Nicky breathed out in relief, and Gigi could faintly hear the sound of wood creaking. She imagined the other girl was sitting on her front porch steps, phone placed carefully on the wood beside her as she looked out into the distance. “Now, what did you want to tell me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Moment of truth</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Gigi thought to herself, quickly pressing the speaker button on her phone and placing it in her lap so she could wring her hands freely. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I like you, Nicky.” The words felt like a weight being lifted off Gigi’s shoulders, though her stomach still seemed a bit uncertain about the whole situation. “But as more than a friend. I like you </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>fucking much, you don’t even understand. I want you. All of you, and not just half-heartedly, wholly. And maybe that’s selfish, but I don’t ca-” Her rambling words were cut off by Nicky letting out a chuckle, which immediately caused Gigi’s stomach to sink. “Why are you laughing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because I could tell, G,” Nicky laughed, Gigi furrowing her eyebrows in confusion. “I like you too, I was just waiting to see how long it would take for you to say something.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really. And I want you too, just so that’s clear.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gigi let the words hang in the air for a moment, a giddy smile slowly stretching across her face. Nicky liked her back. Nicky knew Gigi liked her, and she liked her back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gigi swore the universe had just performed some sort of miracle in her favor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, does that mean I can take you out on a date then?” Gigi asked after a moment, a sudden burst of confidence overtaking her. She heard Nicky let out another laugh, but this time the laughter caused Gigi’s heart to skip a beat, her whole body feeling light as a feather.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I thought you’d never ask.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. m/m Branjie: “You can hold my hand if you want.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “You can hold my hand if you want.” m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Brooke was nervous. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t her pre-pageant nervousness she had become accustomed to throughout the years. No, this was a different kind of nervousness, one that threatened to overwhelm her and make her say stupid shit in front of her castmates, only for the whole world to hear it later.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And it didn’t help that she </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>the branjie question was going to be asked at some point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But no matter what happened out there, she was determined to put on a brave face and bear it all. She had to. For her sake, for her fans’ sake. For Vanjie’s sake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Backstage though? Backstage she let herself crumble just a little, curling in on herself as she perched upon a case used to store equipment. She wrung her hands as she watched her castmates in the distance, many of them scrambling to finish getting ready for filming. Glancing around she could see various stage hands placing chairs on the stage, the lighting crew up in the rafters above her making sure every light was angled to illuminate the queens perfectly, a group in the soundbooth preparing for all the microphones that were about to be set up. Everyone around her had a job to do, something to focus on, while she had nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was times like these that she hated flying through her routine so quickly, wishing she was still sitting amongst her castmates as she focused on perfectly applying her eyeshadow.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It didn’t take long for Brooke to get pulled into her head, zoning out as her eyes remained focused on the chairs being arranged on stage. But ask quickly as she zoned out, she was brought back into the moment by a hand on her shoulder. Her head whipped around, almost dislodging the hat she had carefully secured to her wig, only to see a concerned Vanjie standing beside her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You okay, papi?” The other queen asked, eyebrows furrowed together as her eyes seemed to quickly scan Brooke’s face, trying to read something from her expression. Brooke straightened her back and did her best to conceal her nerves, putting on her best fake smile. Years of pageants had helped her perfect the ability to smile when she felt like throwing up from nerves.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’m fine. Great, even.” Brooke replied, though she could tell Vanjie wasn’t buying any of it. Instead of saying something else or trying to pry a response out of Brooke, Vanjie simply hopped up onto the crate, taking a seat beside Brooke and wrapping an arm around her reassuringly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the distance, she could hear one of the crew members calling out a ten minute warning, urging the queens to hurry the hell up and get ready to go to their places on stage. In an odd way, Brooke felt a sense of relief knowing that she would soon be on stage doing her thing, trying to give the producers good tv while convincing them she was the best choice for the crown. It was down to her and Yvie, though she had a feeling they had already decided on their winner. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ll do great out there, B,” Vanjie murmured softly, her head coming to rest on Brooke’s shoulder. “I know you will. I’mma try to sit next to you, that way you can hold my hand if you want. Y’know, if you get too anxious and shit.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Brooke couldn’t help but let out a laugh, her head carefully resting on top of Vanjie’s. “Thanks, Vanj. I appreciate it,” she murmured. “You’re the best.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know,” Vanjie replied, shooting her a cheeky grin. “Now c’mon, gotta finish getting ready for the camera!”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. m/m Branjie: "You love me as if I deserve you.” & “You’re wrong and I’ll prove it.”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompts: "You love me as if I deserve you.” &amp; “You’re wrong and I’ll prove it.”  m/m Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“You love me as if I deserve you, but I don’t.” Brooke knew he was spiraling again, but there were times when he just couldn’t help it. He was constantly on the brink of falling apart, desperately grasping at the seams of his life to keep them from bursting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Most of the time, Vanjie was able to talk him back from the edge, steady his nerves and anxiety enough to allow him to live in the moment. Other times, he felt like he was nothing but a burden to the other man, holding him back from moving on to bigger and better things. Things that didn’t include Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Today, Brooke felt like a burden.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel his hands shaking, his breathing shallow as his eyes focused in on one spot on the floor where the old tile met the wall of Vanjie’s kitchen. The more he focused on it, the further he felt himself slipping away from reality, Vanjie’s voice the only thing tethering to that moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re wrong and I’ll prove it,” the younger queen insisted, kneeling in front of Brooke with a concerned expression on his face. With most other people, Brooke would hate being on the receiving end of such an expression. Most other people confused concern with pity, but with Vanjie the expression was so filled with love that it was like being wrapped in a warm blanket. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How?” Brooke whispered, his voice almost hoarse. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Feeling Vanjie place his hand on top of Brooke’s was comforting, and the small smile Vanjie flashed at him sent Brooke’s heart pounding in his chest, but not from anxiety this time. No, this time his heart was pounding because even after being together for months, Vanjie still managed to make him feel like some dumb school boy in love.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By reminding you ever single day how much you deserve love, and by loving you no matter what.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. f/f Branjie: “Hold my hand until it’s over?”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Hold my hand until it’s over?” f/f Branjie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Vanessa was terrified of needles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, she had gotten tattoos before and had to face her fear of needles then, but she had always had Silky or A’keria by her side whenever she had gotten a tattoo in the past. This time, it was just her and Brooke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And they were getting matching tattoos.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It might have been a crazy idea (or at least, that’s what A’keria said the moment Vanessa excitedly began babbling to her friends about it), but Vanessa’s whole life felt like a series of crazy ideas - why not pull Brooke into the craziness?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tattoos had technically been Brooke’s idea. After watching some cheesy rom-com on their couch one night, Brooke had off-handedly mentioned that she wanted another tattoo, and maybe they should get new ones together. They went back and forth for weeks before finally deciding what they wanted to get. Vanessa was beyond excited about their choice, but also terrified.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not because of how big of a commitment it was to get matching tattoos, but because she was scared of needles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tried to put on a tough act as they walked into the tattoo parlor together, mentally attempting to convince herself that she wasn’t scared. The moment she sat down in the back though, the act was up. As the tattoo artist readied his station, Vanessa glanced up at Brooke, hoping she didn’t look too afraid.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hold my hand until it’s over?” She asked softly, her nerves melting away as Brooke flashed her a smile and took her hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course.” God bless Brooke for not laughing, Vanessa thought, letting out a sigh of relief.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A few hours later, the pair walked out of the tattoo parlor, still holding hands. Only this time, they both had the date they met permanently etched into their wrists.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. f/f Jankie: "I'd like to see you try"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: "I'd like to see you try" f/f Jan/Jackie (Jankie)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Baaaaaabe, come on! We haven’t been </span>
  <em>
    <span>out </span>
  </em>
  <span>out in forever,” Jan whined from the other room, causing Jackie to let out a laugh. Jackie could hear her girlfriend huff, followed by the soft thud of her dragging herself into the room. While most people found Jan’s dramatic nature annoying, Jackie found it endearing, one of the many reasons she fell so hard for the other woman.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We just went out last weekend,” Jackie replied, watching as Jan sat on the back of the couch, then gracefully flopped back so she was hanging upside down off the piece of furniture. Jan’s hair fell over the edge of the cushion, brushing against the floor as she pouted at Jackie. Something about the action caused Jackie’s heart to flutter, even though she had seen Jan hanging off their couch like that dozens of times before. It was just such a </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jan </span>
  </em>
  <span>thing to do, and Jackie’s heart was so filled with love for Jan that it still gave her butterflies at times.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, to get Chinese food before our movie marathon.” Jan kicked her feet up into the air as they hung off the back of the couch, her arms folded over her chest. “You know, the one where we </span>
  <em>
    <span>stayed in </span>
  </em>
  <span>and watched episodes 1 through three of Star Wars? Not that I didn’t love cuddling with you during all the lightsaber battles, but I wanna go dancing with you. In a club.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>I can’t dance like that. All of my dancing skills come from theatre, they don’t usually incorporate twerking into the choreography for group numbers in musicals.” Jackie felt a surge of pride wash over her as Jan let out a loud laugh at her joke, and Jackie let a smile spread across her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She moved to sit cross-legged in her chair as Jan maneuvered herself to be rightside up once more, mirroring Jackie’s position from her spot on the couch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll teach you!” Jan exclaimed excitedly, her eyes lighting up as she leaned forward a bit. “Please?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d like to see you try,” Jackie replied with a laugh, nodding her head as she spoke. She doubted Jan’s dance lessons would be very helpful, but if nothing else, it would certainly make for an interesting evening.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. f/f Jankie: "Do you trust me?"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: "Do you trust me?" f/f Jankie</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jackie could feel her nerves threatening to get the best of her. It was opening night of their show, the show that would count for over half of her grade in her acting course. She had done plenty of shows before, but this was her first time playing a lead role. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, she had dreamt of this moment and worked her ass off to make it happen. But now that it was finally a reality? Jackie felt like she was going to be sick from the nerves.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sitting in front of the mirror in her dressing room, Jackie set down her makeup brush to suck in a shaky breath. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everything is under control, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she reminded herself, trying to convince herself that she could do this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then she heard bright, cheery laughter, and saw a flash of lavender hair before a pair of arms wrapped around her shoulders from behind. She quickly relaxed into the embrace, knowing immediately that it was Jan who had come to see her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Throughout the semester, Jan had been her rock, and vice versa. They had been practically inseparable, running lines with each other in diners late into the night, practicing choreography together for hours on end. Jan was both her number one supporter and her biggest inspiration, a combination of roles that seemed to come so naturally to the other girl.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You excited for tonight?” Jan asked eagerly, quickly leaning down to press a kiss to Jackie’s cheek before resting her chin on top of her head. Jan flashed her a smile in the mirror, her hands finding Jackie’s and giving them a light squeeze.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jackie let out a small, anxious laugh in response, unable to think of the words to explain how she felt. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>excited, but she was also nervous as hell, simultaneously confident in her abilities and unsure of herself. She was a weird, conflicting muddle of emotions, but didn’t know how to express that to the other girl. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Luckily, Jackie didn’t have to explain. Jan seemed to understand without Jackie having to say a word, her eyebrows knitting together in worry as she moved to stand in front of her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Jacks, listen to me. You’re going to </span>
  <em>
    <span>kill it</span>
  </em>
  <span> out there, I know you are. You were </span>
  <em>
    <span>born </span>
  </em>
  <span>for this role, I swear.” Jan’s words were reassuring to Jackie, but only slightly. She shrugged her shoulders lightly, which caused Jan to let out an exasperated sigh. Jackie wasn’t really sure what had gotten into her, she just didn’t feel like her usual self in that moment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause, and before she knew it, Jackie was being pulled out of her chair by a grinning Jan. She let the lavender-haired girl drag her down the hallway past the stage entrance and to a door Jackie had never been through before. Stopping just in front of the door, Jan spun to face Jackie once more, looking like she was practically buzzing with excitement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you trust me?” Jan asked, her fingers intertwining with Jackie’s. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jackie felt her heart skip a beat at the words, her breath hitching in her chest. “Absolutely,” she replied, and then she was being guided through the unfamiliar door. She followed Jan up a flight of stairs and through another door, quickly realizing the other girl had brought her up to the catwalk.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She paused in her tracks, her hand instinctively squeezing Jan’s hand in an attempt to bring the girl to a halt too. Jan gave her a pleading look, lightly tugging at Jackie’s hand, before slowly taking a step backwards toward the center of the catwalk. Jackie caved, tightening her grip on Jan’s hand as she walked across the metal platform with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stopped once they were in the middle of the catwalk, Jan leaning against the rails to gaze down at the stage below them. But while Jan was staring at the ground below them, Jackie was busy staring at Jan.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mind telling me what we’re doing up here?” Jackie asked after a few moments of silence, her stomach doing flips as she saw Jan’s lips curl up into a smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re the best actor here, Jacks. You’re so far above them - both in talent and now in physical location, too.” Leave it to Jan to drag her all the way up here for the sake of some silly pun.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the tactic worked, causing Jackie to let out a genuine laugh, her wall slowly crumbling thanks to Jan.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m serious!” Jan exclaimed, which only made Jackie laugh more. Not because she didn’t believe her, but because the pun was too obvious </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>to laugh at. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Jan’s next words made Jackie’s laughter die out, replaced by a warmth that seemed to radiate through her body from her heart pounding within her chest, pushing aside all of the nerves she felt. “You’re a star, Jackie. One day the whole world will see it, but for now, you have to show this audience just how much of a star you are. Go break a leg.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. f/f Jankie: “I feel safe with you.” / Soulmate AU</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: f/f Jankie: “I feel safe with you.” / Soulmate AU</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jackie had always struggled to fully accept who she was. Though she had never been particularly religious, she had grown up with the weight of her Persian heritage on her shoulders, the weight of a culture that didn’t approve of her being gay.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had known she was gay for </span>
  <em>
    <span>years</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but had denied it as much as she could, desperately trying to convince herself that she wasn’t gay. That she wasn’t a disappointment to her family and her culture.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even after she turned 18 and the name of her soulmate appeared on her wrist, she continued to deny it. She was convinced that </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jan</span>
  </em>
  <span> was a mistake, that it was meant to read </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jon </span>
  </em>
  <span>and the </span>
  <em>
    <span>o </span>
  </em>
  <span>had gotten fucked up somehow. She carried that belief with her for years, telling anyone who asked that the name on her wrist read </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jon, </span>
  </em>
  <span>though she refused to ever show anyone, too afraid of how they might react to that damn </span>
  <em>
    <span>a</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She carried that denial with her into her 20s, never accepting who she was until she was at a house party with her friends in college nearly 3 years after the name had appeared on her wrist. Jackie had lost sight of her friends, and in her attempts to search from them in the sea of drunken students, ran right into </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Bright purple hair and an even brighter smile that made her heart skip a beat and her stomach fill with butterflies. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t even need to ask the girl’s name, she just </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And clearly the girl did too, because that night they spent </span>
  <em>
    <span>hours</span>
  </em>
  <span> chatting and doing shots together. To any outsider, they probably looked like a pair of friends bonding after years apart, but that couldn’t have been farther from the truth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That night, they didn’t talk about the names on their wrists, didn’t mention anything about whatever mystical force brought them together, but at one point Jackie caught a glimpse of her own name on the girl’s arm and any lingering doubts she may have had disappeared</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was something about the girl (</span>
  <em>
    <span>Jan</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she had confirmed as much when a friend screeched her name before pulling her into a hug and telling her she was heading home early) that made Jackie feel...comfortable. She made all of her worries melt away, the only thoughts left in her head about the purple-haired girl. If Jackie were more of a skeptic, she would have blamed it on the alcohol or any number of other things. But the moment she met Jan, she didn’t want to deny anything anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even after the party ended and they were forced to leave, they didn’t leave each others’ side, instead making their way to a nearby park to keep talking. The pair took up residence on a bench, Jan crossing her legs as she turned to face Jackie while intently listening to everything she had to say. Jackie swore she had never seen anyone more beautiful before in her life.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They talked about anything and everything; childhood aspirations and their favorite movies, their families and holiday traditions and their majors. They were a pair of open books, eagerly reading through everything the other had to offer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before they knew it, they could see the sun beginning to rise in the distance, and Jackie felt fatigue settling into her bones. She knew she needed to go home soon, but she didn’t want to leave Jan’s side. So when the purple-haired girl started to get up and leave, Jackie quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her into a kiss, and everything felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>right</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It felt like everything had clicked into place, and the world came to a standstill.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When they pulled apart a minute later, Jackie couldn’t help but quirk an eyebrow up at the sight of Jan flashing her a shit-eating grin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You make a habit of kissing girls you meet at parties?” Jan teased, before letting out a soft chuckle, her hand lingering on Jackie’s knee.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Only you,” Jackie replied as she shook her head. “I feel safe with you.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. f/f Goodesport: “Where were you when I needed you?”</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompts: “Where were you when I needed you?” / Poorly Timed Confession f/f Goodesport</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p></p><div class="sresposta">
  <p>The moment jan stepped through the front door of her apartment, she could feel that something was <em>off.</em> The air in the room felt stagnant and all too suffocating, and immediately her mind began racing with worry.</p>
  <p>
    <em>Where was Gigi?</em>
  </p>
  <p>Though the two were roommates, they had been sleeping together off and on for months at that point. And in the process, maybe Jan had caught feelings, but she had done her best to suppress them in order to not make things awkward for either of them. Hooking up was one thing, but <em><strike>falling in love</strike></em> catching feelings was entirely different and completely off the table for them.</p>
  <p>As she hesitantly stepped through the living room, Jan felt her heart began to erratically inside her chest as her eyes took in the sight before her. Blankets strewn across the floor, couch cushions overturned, shards from a broken glass scattered across the carpet. Jan sucked in a shaky breath and made a beeline for Gigi’s bedroom.</p>
  <p>She knocked once against the wooden door, but didn’t wait for permission to throw the door open - she could hear Gigi’s choked sobs through the wall, and that was all the permission Jan needed to barge in.</p>
  <p>“Geege?” She murmured, her heart sinking in her chest as she saw Gigi curled up on the floor, tears streaming down her face.</p>
  <p>“Where were you when I needed you?” Gigi’s voice cracked as she spoke the words, another round of sobs wracking her body, and Jan instantly hated herself for not coming home sooner. She had seen the girl’s <em>I need you - now</em> text and assumed she was just lonely and looking for some fun. But now, Jan could tell Gigi really needed her for more than a hookup.</p>
  <p>“I’m sorry, I’m here now,” Jan reassured her, moving to kneel in front of Gigi only to have a pillow thrown at her head.</p>
  <p>“Don’t you <em>dare</em> come anywhere near me,” Gigi hissed, her eyes dark and narrowed in Jan’s direction.</p>
  <p>“Geege, I -” Jan started, but was quickly cut off by a sandal being launched her direct as well.</p>
  <p>“I <em>needed </em>you! I <em>loved</em> you and I needed you and you just fucking abandoned me, and for what? So you could go fuck Jackie instead?” Gigi snapped, her voice shrill as it echoed throughout the room and rang in Jan’s ears. The weight of her words nearly knocked Jan off her feet, bringing tears to the blonde’s eyes.</p>
  <p>“<em>You what?</em>” Jan asked softly. She could barely hear herself over the pounding of her own heart, which she could feel throughout her entire body. If she was being honest, she wasn’t even sure if she had heard herself properly, much less if she had heard Gigi’s words right.</p>
  <p>“Get. Out.” Jan watched as her roommate’s entire body tensed up, and she knew the other girl was doing everything in her power not to break down in front of her. “I said get out!”</p>
  <p>So Jan did. Without saying another word, she walked right out of Gigi’s room, grabbed her jacket and keys, and left the apartment.</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>you can find me on tumblr @/astrodrag</p></blockquote></div></div>
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